Friday 22 January 2016

Take off by James


  Climbing the long winding stairs towards the mountain like rocket, many mixed emotions swelled up in my body. Beneath me was a large, hard drop. I tried not to look down but I couldn’t resist, instantly I regretted it.
  Rain poured down on the cheering crowd, but they didn’t seem to mind. Their umbrellas made the sparkle with many different colours. I climbed into the rocket. Take off was immense. I took one last look at Earth. The last thing I saw was the red explosion like fire pit. The G force was even more than I had expected.
  I could hardly breath.
  “Help!”    
  



2 comments:

  1. Hi James,

    I really enjoyed reading your blog post. I particularly liked the build up in your opening paragraph - and how you couldn't resist the urge to look down (only to regret it!)-very realistic.
    Next time read over carefully; it looks like you may have missed a word between the and sparkle.

    Keep up the good work.

    Mr P.
    OLOL
    Bury

    ReplyDelete
  2. Dear Mr P,

    Thank you very much for your comment. You are right the word I messed was 'ground'.

    Thank you again,
    James

    ReplyDelete